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The lowstar lowdown 9 - monday 10th july

Good day to you all! And haven’t we been blessed with some right mighty fine weather for this here time of the year. Excepting if you have to get on the tubes or buses or if you have particularly bad hayfever or no air conditioning or if you’re a miserable git like half of lowstar. Yes, we’re back with another update and half of us are loving the weather and making full use of it while the other half are sitting out of the sun moaning about the heat and praying for rain and when we get it... well then we moan about the rain and pray for the sun. but at least we’re consistent and it saves you asking how we are. So it’s not all bad.

So what have the lowstar boys been up to? Well our summer holiday is over after the trip to the studio and we have been back in the studio to rehearse. It’s early days yet though so we don’t really know what we’re rehearsing for, although it’s likely to be a gig and it’s likely to be soon-ish. There you go. None of this sitting on the fence bollocks from us. None of this keep ‘em on the edge of their seats uncertainty, the waffling round the point, the buying time and padding things out just to get away from the fact that we don’t know the answer. No. not with lowstar, we’re straight down the middle. You ask the question and we answer it. Hell, you didn’t even ask the question and we’re answering it. In black and white. Straight to the issue at hand. ‘What’s happening next, lowstar?’, you didn’t even ask. ‘we’ll probably play a gig. Sometime.’, we answer straight away. If only everything in life was so easy.

The practice went well though. Amazing really cos some of us had left the continent to sit on a beach, while others of us had been furiously protecting pickernick baskets, yet more of us had been working hard on a thesis about how to make a computer fill a screen with a phrase like ‘ian is skill’ - although apparently you can change that phrase to anything you want! Anything in the whole world! - and still others of us have sat and watched the world cup on a sofa. And we’d done all that for about 4 weeks and then off to practise expecting to make a racket like top cat and his gang do in the alley with trash cans for drums and cardboard boxes with rubber bands for guitars but no, it actually went quite well! Although uncle rob did have to check which end of his bass he had to blow in. we played through the stuff we’d done in the studio and then some older stuff and tried a few new ideas out. It all sounded pretty good and I think we’ll try to get some of the new ideas moving forward so we can add them to future gigs.

is this him? Ian was reunited with his industrial strength ear-protectors, these protectors are not your inconspicuous types wearing smart suits with earpieces and lapel mics blending subtly into the background though. Oh no. these are your huge 8ft wide 10ft tall guys in tuxes. There’s no messing with these ear protectors. Sound trembles in fear at the thought of taking them on. So nervous were the sound waves leaving the amps that there was a delay between strum and sound while they visited the little boys room. On the downside though ian’s head was a little keyhole shaped when practise finished because of the squeezing of the protectors. We’re hopeful that his head will go back to its normal shape after a hot shower though. You may be able to help us out though as the latest lowstar debate has begun in earnest. We would greatly appreciate your thoughts as to which star wars character ian looks more like in his ear protectors. Is it lando’s right hand man in cloud city lobot or princess leia herself. Please examine the photos and let us know. Also let us know if you’ve spotted anyone else out there who you may think resembles ian in his protectors. I’m thinking mr t probably does a bit.

or maybe more like this? The practice had a somewhat strange beginning. Keith, as he tends to do, took advantage of not having as many pedals to set up as magic nor as much equipment to put together as ian and also of not having as much self-restraint as rob, to break the silence by playing through an obscure tv/film theme tune. This time it was the inspector clousseau theme from the pink panther cartoon. Having played it through a few times a strange man burst into the room, claiming to be a producer of mainly hip hop tunes and said he loved the riff. None of us had the heart to tell him it was from a cartoon. So if he’s reading this. It’s from a cartoon. Listen out for it, I reckon it could make a right good chart topper. Or a eurovision winner, you never know after this year’s entrant.

Onto the tea break and yet more experiences for lowstar members ian and rob, who, believe it or not, had never eaten a yumyum. Well, they were expecting allsorts of magnificent culinary treats but I think in the end were a little disappointed with a straightened out ring doughnut. In fact, ian gave up on it and went for biscuits instead, so upset was he at the disappointment of yumyums.

It was also interesting to note that while rob and ian appeared to have gained something from performing the new studio songs in a recording studio - from all the extended practising and the intense day of recording itself. Magic and keith were all over the place trying to work out which bits of their manifold parts they would try to reproduce. I say magic and keith but that’s only to make keith feel a bit better, for magic didn’t seem that bothered. Actually, what am I doing, it’s not like this update to pander to keith’s feelings. I think he’s counted himself out of yet another woestar. But who walked off with the reward this week? Well, we did consider getting in a guest judge for this week’s lowstar woestar. We were going to ask fifa to do it. I know they’ve been busy and all but they’re also well practised at these sorts of decisions, you know, picking out the cream and rewarding them. Unfortunately for keith we were unable to get hold of them. For having read that frank lampard made it into the top 60 players of the world cup, keith would surely have been a shoe-in for his first ever woestar award, his muddled up playing of studio songs perfectly matching frank’s cow’s arse and banjo shooting. Rob was more like john terry, mostly confident and commanding with the occasional pig’s ear chucked in for good measure. So who was our owen hargreaves and how far are we going to take this sorry world cup analogy... some would say too far already. Ian was this week’s steven gerrard (with better hair though obviously) consistent and reliable with some breathtaking moments of brilliance, but ultimately he let himself down with a bad miss at the end. In gerrard’s case it was a penalty, obviously, and ian’s the failure to appreciate fully the yumyums. This football/band performance business is a tough one ian, chin up and hang in there. Remember class is permanent, form temporary etc etc. which leaves magic as owen hargreaves. No one expected him to win it this time, but you can’t ignore his performance, he was everywhere and worked tirelessly. Hargreaves scored with his penalty - magic scored with his yumyums. hargreaves comes from the land of the maple leaf, bryan adams and the Yukon trail - magic comes from the land of samphire, alan woodbine and that path that goes down the gravel pits down the bottom of grove road. It all fits. Congratulations magi-boy!

So finally, some thoughts from practice

- after a goodly period away from the rehearsal studio, you’ll all be pleased to hear that the ikea trolley is doing well. Although it nearly caused two grown men to fall over.
- Magic ran out of juice for his flange, which made us think is there a peak in the national grid when he plugs in all his pedals?
- Will rob and ian walk out one day when keith and ian accidentally discover they both know the same 80s hair metal intros?
- What has imaginary alan been up to this week?
- Who will get to magic’s house first next week? He has managed to set rob and ian against each other and this week it was a dead heat, but will one of the fabled lowstar rhythm section beat the other to magic’s flat... this could be the new gumball rally.

Right that’s it. Maybe more on imaginary alan next week, this week he's been holed up with his imaginary girlfriend and is refusing to speak to keith at all - honestly, does anyone else have an imaginary friend that refuses to speak to them? But that’s it for now. Have a great week, more from us, probably next week or something.
Lowstar out.

blog list
recording november 2008
gig email - 20 nov 2007
gig email - 24 jul 2007
happy new year - tuesday 16 jan 2007
lowstar lowdown 17 - monday 16 oct 2006
lowstar lowdown 16 - monday 18 sep 2006
lowstar lowdown 15 - monday 11 sep 2006
lowstar lowdown 14 - monday 28 aug 2006
lowstar lowdown 13 - monday 14 aug 2006
lowstar lowdown 12 - monday 31 jul 2006
lowstar lowdown 11 - monday 24 jul 2006
lowstar lowdown 10 - monday 17 jul 2006
lowstar lowdown 9 - monday 10 jul 2006
lowstar lowdown 8 - monday 26 jun 2006
lowstar lowdown 7 - monday 19 jun 2006
lowstar lowdown 6 - monday 05 jun 2006
lowstar lowdown 5 - lowstardate 27th may.6
lowstar lowdown 4 - monday 22 may 2006
lowstar lowdown III - return of the blog (15 may 2006)
lowstar lowdown 2 - wednesday 10 may 2006
lowstar lowdown 1 - friday 28 april 2006